Maryam’s Musings

Why do people like to talk bad about you behind your back? If she doesn’t like what I have been doing, can’t she just be honest and tell me straight on my face? I don’t like what happened to me yesterday. I think I had the worst time of my life. What made it even worse is that the people who listened to her blaming me for all the mistakes are my good friends. And she knows it. Maybe she had everything planned out - so that these people would actually tell me and that I would finally know it and then she’d be happy because I will feel so lousy. But one of my closest friend told me that she was actually trying to cover up all her shortcomings (a lot of things did not get done despite the fact that I have informed her in the meeting 2 weeks ago).

Nevertheless It was just so depressing. I cried - and each of my three good friends really understood what I was going through. Of course, my other half supported me and encouraged me, so I felt okay.. finally.

But last night, before going to bed, I reflected again on what had happened. I cried for so long. I never thought this would happen to me. I wished I knew what to do. Do I just ignore what had happened? Do I pretend that nothing happened? Should I show her that I knew that she had been bad-mouthing me?

This morning, she came to my office to get some documents from another colleague of mine. I had the intention to say hello to her, but then, she just walked straight past me! That was the point of time when I felt the worst! But I ignored what I felt, went right to her and asked if everything was alright. Stupid, wasn’t I?

But then.. Rasulullah experienced worse than what I went through today and he still showed good behaviour to his enemies. I should follow the Sunnah, shouldn’t I? She still would need my help since she was the one who took over my place!

Allah.. please give me strength.. show me the right path… guide me…………..

I should be stronger, and wiser, and less emotional at work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!